Re: And he doesn't even know...

[Jayrin]

"Before we give you any medications, we'll give you a pregnancy test, okay? And if that comes back negative, we'll go from there."

"Okay..." I said softly, beginning to feel a little numb. Hopefully I wasn't. I mean, if I was, okay... but I didn't want to be pregnant. Too much to handle.

The nurse shut the chart and held the door open for me. "Let's go get that test taken, then you came come back here and we'll come back and give you the results."

[Ikuar]

I was hoping through the whole thing that she didn't think I was upset about it, because that wasn't the case. Far from it. I eventually wanted to have children but the thought of it happening before I even had a career down was terrifying.

There were so many what ifs... I swallowed hard. I wasn't sure what to say, should I have asked questions?

[Jayrin]

I came back a couple of minutes later and sat on the bed again. "They said it'll be a while before the results come in..."

[Ikuar]

"So... wuddawe do until then?" I asked, kind of running over my own words, I was feeling kind of shaky. "Do we go home or wait here?" I asked. I kept praying to myself about it, about what we'd do.

[Jayrin]

"We're supposed to just sit here and wait..." I said softly. "Maybe they'll come in faster that she said. She said it's be about twenty minutes. Maybe it'll only be about ten or fifteen?"

[Ikuar]

"Maybe." I was being quiet but not because I was upset or anything, I was trying to plan ahead just in case. We'd need a bigger apartment and a new car, baby stuff like diapers, clothing, food, bottles... a car seat and eventually it would go to school and then it would need more than that.

School supplies...

Twitch. -.o

[Jayrin]

I sighed and stared anxiously at the door. The longer I sat there, the more probably it seemed that I could actually be pregnant. I sighed. "What if I am pregnant?"

[Ikuar]

I suddenly spewed out everything I had previously been thinking and then stopped.

"Ah..." I gaped a second, "If... if you are then I'll do everything in my power to make sure the both of you are well taken care of. I love you." I was shaking.

[Jayrin]

"And you're scared too." I pointed out with a small smile. "We'll be alright."

We waited in silence for a couple more minutes when the nurse came in with the results. "Well, We ran the test twice to be sure. And it came out positive, both times... meaning you are, in fact, pregnant."

I stared at her. "Uhuh...."

[Ikuar]

And that's when all the questions came out, and I mean a lot of them were there but I hadn't even thought of half of them until that second.

"So will it be okay? Is it a boy or a girl? Does it do anything, and how can I know if something is wrong with it? What should I do to help Sammy through this?"

I exploded.

[Jayrin]

The nurse stared at him. "It's only about two or three weeks old, and you won't know the gender until three months into her pregnancy. It's not doing much at this point and is Samantha is having any unusual stomach or chest pain, she needs to come in. Any unusual symptoms, she needs to be seen. As for the last question, you need to ask her that."

I was currently laid down on the bed, staring at the ceiling. I was going to be a mother... was I ready for this?

[Ikuar]

"Sorry." I was sure my face was red, I wanted to do what I could do to help with everything though so it felt like as soon as I knew I was in this weird parenting mode.

But I wasn't sure how to talk about it yet... she seemed shocked and I was too.

[Jayrin]

"I'm going to schedule an ultrasound for you in two weeks. The tech is on vacation. Is that okay?"

I nodded. "Yeah, I'll be there."

"Okay, we'll call you with the date and time. You're ready to go."

"Okay." I got up slowly and stared at my stomach for a moment. Well, time to suck it up. I was going to be a mother whether I liked it or not. I looked to Will though, and couldn't help but smile. At least I knew he wouldn't leave me... and he would take care of me.

[Ikuar]

As we left I was thinking about everything that had happened the past year and how much our lives were changing and yet I hadn't done anything in proper order at all.

I looked at her and then back at the road.

"Let's call her Beanie..." I said, "A-At least until we know what she is... but I want a girl."

[Jayrin]

"Beanie?" I laughed. "Okay then..." I poked my stomach. "Is this real? Or am I just having a really strange dream...?"

[Ikuar]

"It's real, I had to use my inhaler twice today... so if it were a dream I wouldn't need my inhaler." I told her and then I smiled, "Beanie..."

[Jayrin]

"Mm... true." I smiled. "I'm almost... kinda happy about this. It's a little earlier than I expected... but I did want this to happen eventually.."

[Ikuar]

"Yeah, same here." I grinned a little, I was kind of on cloud nine, thinking about it and what I would do and how great it would be to have a baby in the house.

I just wished I'd finished school already.

[Jayrin]

"I hope I don't get fat after the baby comes."

[Ikuar]

"I don't think you will if you keep up with the diet you already have." I smiled, "Just eat right and we can take walks too if you want." I offered.

[Jayrin]

"Walks... until I'm to the waddling point. Then no more walks." I said happily. "They have cute maternity clothes in Wal-Mart! I need to look at some after I start showing..."

[Ikuar]

"So the shirts you have now won't fit...?" I asked, but then I regretted asking that.

So I quickly added, "That's right, maternity clothes are a good idea! You wouldn't want to feel a draft."

Crud, it got worse. D:

[Jayrin]

And I slapped him. "Stop talking like I'll be as fat as a cow, alright? Geez... I won't be that huge."

[Ikuar]

"N-No that's not what I meant!" OnO

I sighed a little bit and wished I knew how to word stuff and then I smiled, more like a soft grin, "You'll be so cute pregnant!"

Was that a compliment? OnO I hoped it was!

[Jayrin]

"That's better. Thank you." I said, patting his shoulder. "Sorry for slapping you."

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